Yikes... It's been a while...

Well, to start off, I made my decision about the job. I took the weather one. The comfortable one. The easy one. The boring one. I'm trying to be happy about it, and I pretty much am. I start work on Monday. Wow, what a load off my mind to be able to have a paycheck again. Thank god.

Now, the real reason I am here. I just chatted for a half an hour with someone. A stranger! Me! I was even the one who initiated it. Of course, I didn't think his smiley face was lit up, so he would see my message after i was logged out, but he answered me right away. It freaked me out. I was thinking that maybe since I am having such a hard time meeting people in person, I could meet some people online and get some experience with meeting people, so i could do it in person some time. But i wanted to take baby steps, start now, and maybe actually talk tomorrow. But he was there, and we talked for a while.

I was looking at my favorite live journal page (in the links) and I saw his picture. He was cute so I clicked on the picture to check him out. He is a very interesting person. He's been through some pretty crappy things and I wanted to tell him to hang on and it will get better. Then we talked for a while. It was nice. And so out of my comfort zone. ( a phrase I hate) I hope I get to talk to him again.

I didn't post this, but last Sunday at 9:00 in the morning the phone rang and woke me up. It was my mom, saying they (her, and my aunt Mary and her husband mike) were outside and asked if I wanted to go shopping with them. Since I was sleeping, my brain had not caught up yet and I said ok, if they wait for me to et ready. So, I went shopping with them. It wasn't horrible, but they are... middle aged, not old yet, but... getting there. We walked around the store and they bought things and then we had lunch and came home. It was a good distraction and got me out of the house finally. Well, I am telling you this now, because I went out with them again tonight. They are fun, for older people, I enjoy being with them. And they enjoy my youthfulness :), but it kind of seems like I'm dating my mom. It seems a little weird. We went and saw the Pink Panther movie. Not my choice, but since I wasn't paying, I didn't want to press my opinion. I wanted to see Failure to Launch. I love Sarah Jessica Parker, and her man for that matter. But Mike wanted to see Pink Panther, so we did. It was ok. Well... it wasn't all that great. I didn't like it very much, but I told them I did because they loved it and I didn't want to harsh anyone's mellow.

On another note... I found out that the boys will be back here on march 29 for spring break. I didn't think it was until the end of April. Woo Hoo!!! I am very happy about this. They are excited too. God, I miss them. Sam said he is over 5'7" now. He was 5'5" the last time I saw him at Christmas. Taller than me @ 5'4". I can't even imagine him being that tall. How the fuck can I have a kid that tall, and going into high school next year? Holy shit! I want to say I am old, but I know I'm not. Well I am in gay years, but not in real life. I just started way to early. I can't wait for them to get here.

I think I've said enough for now. I will try to update this more often. I should add something about my moods, since i know there is one person reading who would want to know. I am still feeling up. I haven't sank into a pit of depression. i have had my times for sure, but i am able to get out of them rather than wallow in them. Such a change for me. Maybe life will work out for me after all. I am still unbelievable lonely, and too timid to go out and meet anyone. I haven't given up though. Not yet at least. I want too many things to give up yet.

bye...