Holy shit! I don't want to do this. I do, but... holy shit. I wasn't nervous before. Now I am. I was looking online to see which gay bar I should go to, there are people there. I saw the pics. Good god, I can't do this. That's what I keep saying to myself. i can't do this. I can't do it. No way No how. NO!
Alright, I'm gonna do it. I swear. I'm gonna feel like such an idiot. What do I do, just walk in and go up to the bar. What if there are too many people there? What if I can't get to the bar? What if there is no place to sit at the bar? Then what? Sit at a table by myself? LOSER I could always ask to join someone at their table... yeah, right. What if no one talks to me? Do I just go up randomly to some stranger and start a conversation? I can't do that! This is a huge step for me, just making it into a bar. Actually starting conversation, that is for next time.
They better be friendly to me. Or at least neutral. Just nothing bad. A nice calm drink. I hope it's dark in there. I just know my face will be all red. It gets that way when I am embarrassed or uncomfortable. Jesus, I can't believe I'm going to do this. I really think I may have a stroke. If my blood pressure wasn't a problem before...
Wish me luck, holy fucking shit!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment