Well, I have been a little lax on the updating thing lately. I am going to do my best to remedy that. I went to my therapist today and it wasn't that great. She (Holly from now on) wants to know why I keep sabotaging myself when it comes to being healthy. My brilliant answer: I dunno. Then there was guilt because I am teaching my kids bad habits, which is true, shame on me.
But... I'm not going to go on and on about it. I am going to be positive about things. I am going to get control of myself. This is the year. Finally. In a move to keep myself motivated I told my mom that I have diabetes. She was kind of surprised, but I am a fat little fucker, so it's not a huge shock. But now she is all in MOM mode, giving me all kinds of advice, she's sorry she gave me fudge for Christmas (I'm not) and wants to get me on the straight and narrow. Now I have to do good or else my mom will be after me.
So, I will give up Coke. I have too. I can do it. Fuck, I want a Coke. I will eat the right things, in the correct amounts. I will slip, but then I will get right back to the PLAN.
I also need to find a job. This is causing me a little stress.
I'm done writing for now. I know I have a lot of incomplete ideas here, but I want to look at porn now, so... bye.
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